God Winks

One of the things I’ve learned about grief in the last 8 months is that it does NOT get better with time!!! In fact, I truly believe it gets harder as each day passes and we simply learn to adjust to the hard reality that our loved one will never physically be present in our lives again.

When my Dad passed away 8 months ago, my world was shattered. Even though there had been a literal ocean between us for many years, the gift of technology meant that I was able to connect on a daily basis and enjoy time in person whenever they were able to come over to Florida. You don’t realize how much you miss the ability to pick up the phone to say hello or share something exciting, until the person you want to share it with is no longer there and I can’t tell you how many times I’ve gone to pick up the phone to call my Dad before realizing I can’t.

AND, the universe is amazing. You see, after Dad died, I began to notice that invariably throughout the week I would check the time and it would be 11:11 or 1:11. Seriously!! What are the chances of that? Some folks might call it coincidence, others would say I intentionally made sure to watch the clock to see it, and the truth is that I believe it was my Dad’s way of letting me know he was still around and watching over me.

Well, this morning I was sitting outside and as I checked my phone, saw once again that it was 11:11 am. I took a moment and decided to look up the meaning of this ‘angel number’. These are the words I read:

“Numerology attaches great importance to the number 11. It represents a new beginning or a positive event. According to numerology, when we look at the clock and the two twin numbers face us, the universe is giving us a supportive signal we may have needed at that moment. Also, the 1:11 angel number is a way for our guardian angels to garner our attention to convey their message.”

Now again, for those of you out there who may, at this point, feel like I’m trying to make something out of nothing, that’s ok. For me, however, those words felt like a message from my Dad to remind me that he sees what I’m doing with the launch of my new business and is 100% cheering me on from afar. I truly believe it was one of those things I call a “God-wink”, just in this case with Dad’s love included too!

Yet, this God-wink didn’t stop there!!! Right after seeing 11:11, out of the corner of my eye I saw a bird fly by. I thought it was a cardinal … and then decided I was clearly just looking for things at that point …. UNTIL …. as I began walking onto the grass, I saw it; yes, the red cardinal was sitting on our hedge-line eating the berries. Not gonna lie, there may or may not have been tears at that point! I truly felt in that moment my Dad was giving me signs that he sees all I’m doing and is proud of me.

Here’s the thing about life; we never know what is going to be around the next corner, any more than we can go back in time to change things. All we have is this moment. I would give anything to hug my Dad one last time, or hear him say in person how proud he is of this new venture of mine. And, I guess in his own unique way he did that for me today.